Every day seems to be another day. It's only boring if you allow it. That's why I'm trying to make my life more interesting, so feel free to follow along and take a ride on my personal roller coaster known as my life.
When I woke up this morning, I took a chance to look outside. Once again, it's snowing. Oh joy.....
I missed work last week, and I'd like to avoid missing it this week. I'm just glad I have a shovel of my own to use, because my place of work's been sold out of snow shovels for several days.
Fortunately, the snow is coming down at a slow pace.
Life Philosophy
I'm not perfect, but I do try to abide by the principle of live and let live in life. With that said, there are times when decisions are made by others that cause me to scratch my head and ask, "What in the world?"
The above video explains what I ran into. I know I can be criticized for my choice in lifestyle, but I am an adult and no longer developing.
It just bothers me sometimes when certain decisions are made that don't appear to be thought through beforehand. I was so disturbed by it that I messaged the person giving them the other side of the story so to speak.
From there, what they do is entirely up to them.
Just because I believe in live and let live doesn't mean I will never voice disagreement with a point of view or a lifestyle decision. The difference is that I don't go out of my way to stop it.
After all, it's not my life and I wouldn't appreciate it if somebody else tried to intervene, because I know what it's like.
Another has tried doing that to me, which is why I no longer associate with them.
The Good News
At least I'm single and don't have much in the way of responsibility. I'm eternally grateful for that, which is why I try to live and let live. I simply have living expenses and other financial obligations to take care of.
From there, it's just making sure I'm ready to deal with each week.
As for more good news, I have started a vlog on Vimeo. The reason I chose Vimeo is because I don't have any desire to create another Google account for the sole purpose of vlogging. I do have a YouTube account, but it will be used for a separate purpose.
I figured it was about time I supplemented this blog with some video of myself speaking. Right now, I'm limiting my videos to around five minutes, give or take a few. Since I'm only allowed to upload 500 MB per week, I'll have to become intimately familiar with OpenShot's exporting options.
In other words, I'm learning how to better compress video.
It also presents an opportunity to become familiar with other video platforms as well as improving some basic film making skills. Sticking with Ubuntu for Now
I was considering trying out other operating systems on my machines, but it turns out that Ubuntu doesn't always peacefully co-exist with other distros. For now, I'll just stick with Ubuntu 12.04 until I get more computers for the sole purpose of doing reviews.
Right now, I just don't have the money to invest in that.
However, I could possibly do live environments such as Puppy and others since it doesn't touch the hard drive.
Well, I better get dressed and prepare to shovel some snow. Since it looks fairly powdery, I may have an easier time shoveling than I did last time. The good news is that I'm parked in a good spot as well.
If I can't get the car out, I may have to ask for help getting to work from those who happen to have four wheel drive.
I did it. It hurt, but I succeeded. The repetitions with the 10 lbs dumb bell has been increased to 45. I have also modified how I do push ups off the wall. I do a set of 16, wait about 20 seconds to cool down, and do another set of 16 for a total of 32 push ups off the wall.
A week from this Wednesday, I'll be at 50 reps with the dumb bell and two sets of 18 push ups off the wall.
We're apparently suffering winter's last gasp. Last week, there was a good amount of snow. This week, there appears to be more of the same. The same goes for the week after that.
Of course this shit happens as I'm about to turn 30.
I'll just have to play my cards carefully and hope that the weather people are wrong in their forecast. At the very least, temperatures should be in the 30's (degrees that is), so that may prevent the new snow from sticking as effectively.
In the mean time, I'll continue my focus on weight training throughout the weeks until the weather becomes consistent enough for me to walk outside on a regular basis. The plan is to eventually save gas by walking to and from work.
Some More Good News
A friend commented last week that it looked like I was losing weight. Another friend of mine told me that I was looking good as of late. One of my coworkers told me that whatever I was doing, it was working.
That means I must continue the path I've been traveling.
Remaining true to myself and living life as I see fit along with molding myself into what I want to be has been the goal that I've been seeking all along. Progress has been made, but there's still much that has to be done.
There's been quite a bit on my mind as of late, but before I get to that, I'd like to share what's been happening thus far this week.
Monday
I visited my friends Steve and Seffy on Monday. Unfortunately, it was very cold outside (of course it warms up the next day too), so even I had a hard time not shivering at 18 degree weather. I can take the cold, but I have my limits.
One of my new favorite places to eat now is the local Burger King in Warrensburg. They have options on the menu that accommodate those who are on a low carb diet. I had three double cheeseburgers without any condiments or a bun along with a side salad without dressing or grape tomatoes.
After hanging out with my friends, I had to go home, because I was having trouble falling asleep that Monday. For whatever reason, I tend to want to stay awake when I'm off work for the next couple of nights.
Tuesday
I took my work clothes to the Washboard Laundry Mat so I could have clean clothes for the week. While clothes were washing, I did some shopping and filled up my gas tank. I returned, put clothes in the dryer, and then went to Muttly's Gun and Pawn to look around.
Pro tip: If you're looking for a cheap place to stock up on anime, a local pawn shop should be on your list of stops to make.
Last night, I checked in on the anime club. There were some friends that I haven't seen in a while and I wanted to check in on them to see how they were doing. We had a wonderful time and it was good meeting one of the new officers.
Nate's a pretty cool guy and I think he will make an excellent treasurer.
The cool thing is that the group has been communicating with other anime clubs as well. This is something that I wanted to see happen, but things happened when I was still in college that prevented that endeavor from being successful. The organization is in excellent hands.
After the club meeting and hanging out in general, I did a little bit more shopping in the early hours of this morning before going home and falling asleep.
That brings me to this morning.
I have successfully upped my repetitions by two. That's 33 with the dumbbell and 23 push ups off the wall. A week from this Saturday, I shall increase everything by three. The pattern will continue until I can do 100 reps with the dumbbell.
The weight will increase and I'll work my way up to 50 with the higher weight before increasing the weight one more time. The goal is eventually use all three weights in the entire routine.
From there, I'll eventually increase the number of sets by one for even more muscle building. Speaking of transitions....
Mental Marination
Like my exercise routine, I'm treading carefully in terms of getting something off my chest. I won't go into it today, because it's prudent to actually brainstorm the ideas that are floating in my mind and organize them into something coherent.
I'll still work on the website. After all, I have yet to write the first article (hint: it will mention Piers Morgan). I'll even do a test podcast. I have the know how to record and edit audio. I just need to do the rest, and that plugin for e107 just might do the trick.
In other words, I'll be taking a brief break from personal blogging until sometime in February. When I return, I'll have something important to say.
Some may like it.
Others may not.
Others may honestly not care.
That's the nature of the Internet.
There's some things that I discovered about myself that explain some things that have happened to me over the last couple of years. It was quite an epiphany that will be channeled to make myself better than I was before.
Those who are curious will get one hint. In life it is important to have that great adventure which the individual explores the self as well as their surroundings before everything else occurs.
Allow that to marinate in your mind for a while, and I'll see all of you in February.
I skipped posting yesterday, because I was hanging out with a few good friends for dinner. I had a wonderful time and got to meet a couple of cool people. I'll talk more about that another day.
What I would like to discuss today is something that I've seen over and over again. It's a mixture of rebels being put off by success in conjunction with infighting and accusations of one of the varying forms of bigotry.
Unfortunately, this horrible concoction has found its way into the nerd and geek realms.
Before I begin, it should be noted that context is very important in fully understanding a situation. Emotions flew all over the place regarding a personal Facebook post on the part of Tony Harris, who has been a part of the comic book industry for over 20 years. Here it is:
Click the image for a larger version on The Daily What.
The published screenshot created controversy, and one of the most well known video responses is as follows:
Of course, there are other responses as well. The one thing that many of these responses had in common was the accusations of sexism and how one shouldn't deem a female to not be a real geek and/or nerd.
I couldn't agree more.
However, what happened was that emotions overwhelmed the part of the mind that is thoughtful and reasonable. It happens to each and every one of us when it comes to a subject that touches are hearts. After all, we're human and prone to this sort of thing.
What I am about to do is to ask you, the reader, to do something that could be potentially challenging (or even difficult) depending on your individual situation.
After reading the entire quote from the screen-cap posted at the beginning and watching the entire video, I would like for you to take a step back, take a few deep breaths, and set your emotions aside for a moment.
It's time to start thinking.
While it is most understandable that women throughout history have been discriminated against, manipulated, and abused, there are times when certain actions are misconstrued as being such when the intent of those actions are entirely different.
Let's begin by asking the question; What was the intent of Tony Harris, a veteran of the comic book industry when he ranted on his own personal Facebook? Was he hanging up a "no girls allowed" sign, or was he speaking out against something else entirely?
Let's go through what he wrote, shall we?
He opines that he's going to say something without caring what everyone else thinks. It's his opinion after all, and as individuals, we are all entitled to ours. He goes on to say that there are some women who cosplay at conventions who are actually into the comic books that the characters come from in the first place.
In other words, he doesn't have an issue with them. What he writes next is what gets him in some hot water. He goes on to say that there are too many women who dress up as some of the most popular characters without having ever read the comic books themselves, let alone know anything about them.
I can see where he would be called sexist on that. However, middle of his rant, he does note that it was based on what has happened around him at his booth at various conventions.
To be fair, there has been various shenanigans that have occurred at various conventions, whether it be of the pro-wrestling, science fiction, comic book, or anime type. There are going to be things that are irritating, no matter what.
I would know as I have experienced it once when I was dressed up as the Millenium Earl at Naka-Kon one year. I was essentially criticized for wearing a mostly pre-made costume instead of putting it together myself. Personally, I didn't care. Elitists are everywhere, and there's nothing that can be done about that.
The problem is that someone speaking out against something that annoys them is often confused with being elitist. In a manner similar to night shift workers at a retail outlet not feeling appreciated when members of management and people from the day are covered in a magazine while they're left out, Harris argues that without the comic book artists and writers, the books themselves would not exist in the first place, there would be no following, and no conventions to speak of.
So again, is he really sexist or is something else going on?
It is often said that a rebel is often put off by their own success. After all, becoming mainstream would mean that they are no longer a rebel, hence their cause is now obsolete. The only option left is to either find a new cause or become irrelevant.
So let's revisit the question. Was he being sexist? Does he hate women cosplayers? Does he hate cosplayers at all?
Well, no, as B. Clay Moore on Twitter points out. For further consideration, here are a couple of comments from the Comics Beat website:
The first comment has some offending parts, such as not being a nerd if one is now just enjoying something. To be honest, I have collected some comic books, but I don't do so anymore. I have a couple, but that's about it. For that reason, I don't refer to myself as a comic book nerd.
My interests are in computers and the software that's on their hard drives. I know full well that the Captain America movie did not follow the comic book series as much as some would have liked. That didn't stop me from enjoying it. The same thing with the Amazing Spiderman movie.
And therein lies the problem.
More and more people know about Captain America, Spiderman, and other comic book characters because of the movies that have been in theaters. I'm fairly confident in saying that a significant portion of the audience of said films more than likely did not read any of the comic books beforehand.
In a sense, Hollywood has made the characters from those books very popular, yet in a sense watered down to the point where most people will never hear of a Tony Harris, J. Michael Straczynski, or John Romita Jr, because they never read the comic books in the first place. That doesn't mean those who enjoyed the movies are bad for only watching the movies.
It simply means they aren't comic book geeks or nerds, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. It appears to me that what Harris was speaking out against was a form of mindless group think. If something looks cool, hip, and "in," there are those who will make themselves appear to be a part of that something, even if that isn't who they are.
It's known as being a pretender, and sadly, they exist no matter the genre. Those who pretend to be something they are not are often not comfortable with who they really are. To be fair, there is no way to tell what the thoughts of every single cosplayer out there happens to be. Only the cosplayer knows.
And to continue to add balance to this discussion, there are those who just think the costume of a character is really cool, so they dress up as that character. Nothing more, nothing less. There's nothing wrong with that. However, I can see how it can be irritating when cameras from corporate controlled media are surrounding that person instead of the writers and artists behind the comic book series in which the character came from.
In other words, the creation of fiction has been taken for granted, and much to the chagrin of some, it is important to recognize that those who created the characters, drew the characters, and wrote stories surrounding the characters are individuals with feelings too.
Notice how I didn't refer to male or female in the last few sentences. I said individual. Before I explain why I did so, here is what Joe The Peacock had to say on the matter at hand:
"Tony has spent his nearly 25 years in comics innovating and creating
some incredible properties, characters, art and culture. One major
aspect of Tony's art: he's one of the very few male artists in
mainstream (superhero) comics who has ever outright refused to draw
idealized / fetishized / objectified women in his work."
Seeing as how Tony is a friend of Joe's, it's a safe bet that he knows him well enough to be able to make such a statement at all. What did the individual in the video accuse Harris of doing? Objectifying women. Also consider the following:
"Have you ever vented in the spur of the moment, something you wish you'd
taken some time to really think out? Have you ever used Facebook as a
catharsis for a burst of emotion? Have you ever felt your logical side
peek out and say "Hey now, you know that's not what you really feel..."
only to have your emotional side say "YEAH BUT IT FELT REALLY GOOD TO
SAY!"
Ever regretted it? Not that you felt it or how you think, but how you said it?
Maybe consider that when you realize that this is what happened here,
but instead of a bunch of comments and unfriending, the guy was put on
an international stage across tons of blogs and Tumblr pages and news
feeds and Twitter and cannot possibly respond to the volume of feedback
(which has, as it did with me, coalesced into a tide of "You're EVIL!")
much less reflect, explain or, if he wanted to, apologize?"
No matter what, words are going to get taken out of context. Emotions that aren't kept in check play a role in that. Trolls will appear in order to stir the pot. That's what trolls do. The cycle keeps going until the latest thing happens that either gets the masses enthusiastic, angry, or both.
To imply that those who say the things that Harris said are no better than the bullies slamming kids into lockers. As someone who has been bullied in school growing up, I find such a notion insulting. Harris has essentially been accused of committing a thought crime.
Did Harris generalize? Yes. Is he the only individual who has done so? No. There is a reason why in various forms of the New Testament, the phrase, "Let he who has not sinned cast the first stone." exists (male oriented, but it's a male oriented religious text we're talking about). It's the same reason that the theme of the pot calling the kettle black exists. In other words, to a degree, we are all hypocrites.
Perhaps before pointing fingers at somebody else, we should all, as individuals, look at ourselves in the mirror and ask, "How can I be better today than I was yesterday?" Nobody is perfect. We are all human.
Too much political correctness is often the death knell of any given community. Harris was not speaking about all women who dressed up in costumes, but about a few he has encountered. While he doesn't speak for an entire community, neither does the individual in the video nor any other blogger who has spoken and will continue to speak on the matter at hand.
In my opinion, it was not about "protecting something from others," but about pointing out how something has become watered down because less and less people are reading the comic books, reading up on the history of the characters and series, and appreciating who brought the product into existence in the first place.
To drive the point home, both males and females are responsible for the wonderful comics that have existed over the years.
To sum up, I share the same views as the kid in one of the Mighty Ducks movies who didn't care about politics between schools and simply wanted to play hockey. I just want to enjoy the occasional comic book (I do plan on getting some more of them at some point, even if it's only digital), watch the occasional movie, play some video games, play on the computer and the Internet.
I just want to have fun and enjoy my life. With that, my opinion has been shared. You the reader are free to do the same.
So tonight, I'm going back to work. The bad part about working the graveyard shift is that one doesn't see a lot of sunlight. The good news is that a lot of interesting people come out at night. They often do things that make me think about myself.
Shopping Habits
Sometimes I get ideas about what groceries to buy as a customer comes through my line. Some of the things they come up with are very interesting. Even if I don't buy something myself, I at least consider it after the fact.
Life Stories
I always like hearing life stories about people. It can include things such as how they met their significant other to how they arrived at their current position in life. It causes me to pause and reflect on my own life. It's often been said that one should know where they've been so they know where they're going.
Where I've Been
Through all the interesting experiences and all the crazy people I've met over the years, I've learned much about myself. I can feel the energy of other people; their hopes, their dreams, their pleasure, their pain are things that I can feel on an emotional level. I have empathy for others, yet I can be truly selfish at times.
I'm this paradox, but one that isn't truly harmful to others. I can understand multiple points of view while holding my own. I'm very complex on the inside, and that's ok.
My mind isn't as fast as others, but I make up for it by constantly thinking. I've taken steps in my life that may appear to be small, but to me is a big deal. After all, I hadn't done them before.
I was the head of a student organization. I wasn't as effective of a leader as I could have been, but the fact of the matter is that I cared enough to make an attempt.
I ran for political office twice. I didn't win this time, but I had a good showing.
I graduated college. While the degree may not reflect my career choice, I proved to myself and others that I could finish what I start.
Those are just a few of the things that I have accomplished in my life. I've also experienced firsts over the past few years. Such experiences have helped me grow in life.
Where I'm Going
Ever get the feeling that something interesting is on the horizon and that it's a good idea to prepare for it? We live in interesting times. Subtle signs of possible things to come include others around me getting into relationships almost all at once, training a new co-worker (let's hope we get to keep him... he seems like a decent person and a hard worker), and friends of mine managing to write 50,000 words in a month.
I know where I've been. I know where I want to go. I just need the motivation to do it. If I can become motivated enough to move to a much better living space than before, I can turn my passions and hobbies into a living. I want to be able to spend the whole day goofing off, having fun, and getting paid while doing it.
For now though, the bills have to be paid. Food needs to find its way into my stomach. A roof needs to remain over my head. With that, I shall grab something to eat, and head back to bed. After all, my weekend has come to an end.
Four. That number is so significant to me right now. Why is that? I'll let you guess for a moment.
Is it a reference to a certain faction in professional wrestling that became legendary? Am I talking about the main elements in our own existence? The corners of the globe? Four is a significant number for me.
Four months.
That's how long my first relationship lasted. That was a hell of run, but it was time for it to be finished. The lady friend's greatest dream was to be a mom. Problem is, I don't want kids. I'm not the parenting type. Never have been. Never will be. She saw it coming too.
It was the high school reunion in Leeton, Missouri. I brought her along with me. I caught up a little bit with everyone, and things were going well until one of the kids started to cry. Children crying grate on my nerves and put me edge. I don't deal with it very well.
I described how I could cope in some instances when she said, "You better get used to it, 'cuz if we're together long enough and we get married, we're having kids!" It felt it like I was shutting down on the inside. I'm not mad at her for that. I'm grateful that she woke me up. For too long, I've been compromising who I was just so I could get into a relationship. Thanks to meeting this person through a mutual friend, I understand fully.
I even told her that to her face. Text messages and Facebook notifications were not appropriate in this instance. I had to explain in person. She understood. She saw it coming. She'll no doubt be a bit sad for some time. Like I told her, "It's not the end of the world, but it is important." Who am I to deny her the future that she wants? If I don't want kids, then being with her as a significant other would have only hurt her and myself.
That, and I have my own future to worry about. If another person comes along, I will be more up front in that category. Chalk it up to another life lesson learned. Now I can start moving on.
"You don't know what you want." I've been told that on occasion. Truth is, I've been indecisive at times. What to eat? What to wear? Certain things day to day get me worked up, because I can't decide. I just can't. Today is different. Not too long ago, I said I would be making some changes. One of them was going to involve hurt feelings.
It's not because I'm going to be insensitive. Sadness is going to occur for a little while, but this decision has to be made. Sometimes there are moments that occur that remind one what they actually don't want out of life. One of those moments occurred ten days ago. Now I am sitting here typing this entry as I try to wake up so I can get some needed business taken care of beforehand.
I told a friend last night that I would be nervous as things draw near. That was no lie. Will there be a mutual understanding? Or will emotions fly all over the place. I don't know yet. It's an area in life I'm not experienced with yet. I will be in a matter of hours. Right now, I just need to get some things done in order to pass the time. When all is said and done, I will make sure I have a nice big dinner. What I'll eat will depend on how this face to face moment goes.
Hope for the best, prepare for the worst. Not that it will be that bad, but I'm not expecting a walk in the park on this one.
I slept from about three in the afternoon yesterday until ten in the morning today. What is it about headaches that make me tired all of a sudden? I rearranged my room the way I wanted it, so now I'll be even more comfortable when I sleep. I'm also going to be at a meeting tonight (yay) before work. That is going to be oodles of fun. In in a previous post, I also mentioned some changes coming down the line in my life.
I won't go into specifics until next week. The reason for that is it's the type of things that has to happen in real life. Sending a text message, posting on a blog, or messaging via instant messenger or social networking site isn't going to cut it when it comes to an important life decision. I will say that I have to do what's right for me and that I can't keep doing something just to make others happy at this point.
It was one of those things where I wished I had it for so long that I didn't realize what I already had. So next week, I have to get that personal part of my life taken care of. After that, I'll be better able to focus on certain things in my life, such as the online magazine I'm supposed to be doing and that campaign I'm supposed to be doing. What happened at the beginning of the year was one of the most wonderful things in my life. However, I need to focus on my future and what is important to me. No doubt it will be emotionally draining, but it has to be done.
Went to my high school reunion. 10 years. It passed quickly and thanks to yesterday, I am thinking more about my future. I have important decisons to make. One of them may result in hurt feelings.
One person wants to go in one direction. The other another. I have a week to think on it. Suffice it to say, if I'm not open about this, it won't be fair to the other person. Until I make this decision, I won't be able to make the others. That is all.
