I began replaying some moments in my mind.
Towards the end of the month, it will be a year since I experienced a moment that would change my life. It was that moment that defied my stance for several years. That defiance made me truly happy.
For many years, I never ever thought I would have a girlfriend. It just didn't seem to be in the cards for me.
In 2012, things changed. I would be introduced by somebody else, and from there, things happened. The relationship would end after four months.
She wants to eventually start a family. Being a father is not in the cards for me as I don't have the patience for it.
Now that I'm sitting here writing this entry, more memories of the past are going through my head.
Memories of falling for someone and writing a three page letter that never reached them. The poor lady always kept getting sick or injured each semester at college. I also have memories of attempting to date other people only to come up short.
I also have a recent memory. It happened towards the end of last year. For the longest time, I wanted to write some status update on Facebook that goes something like this:
"That moment when you realize you've been blocked and that it doesn't really matter."Perhaps it was something I said via chat. Perhaps it was something that I had shared and/or wrote regarding current events. It doesn't matter really. All that matters is that I was told by the individual in question through their actions that they don't want to associate with me, and they have a right to do so.
Facebook is a great medium of communication, but it's not my entire life. Whenever somebody, whether it's through their words or actions, screams, "LEAVE ME ALONE!," I simply comply.
What I seem to be looking for in those memories are life lessons to remember. I find only one.
Take control of your own life and own destiny before a group of people decides how you should conduct your own affairs.
I know I said that yesterday. I simply decided to apply it to my own life today. Things are changing, because we all live in interesting times. Something very important and very interesting is on the horizon, so the prudent thing for me to do is to be prepared.
It's time for me to seize the day and determine my own fate.
